What are your dreams and desires for your family? Think back, somewhere along the line, what kind of life did you envision for your family? Maybe you don’t know how to answer those questions. Maybe it has been a while since you thought about such things because life just keeps going at such a fast pace. Today, we are going to slow down and think about how you would answer those questions now, and in the reality of the life your family is currently in. 

What is a Family Mission Statement? 

If you have never heard of a family mission statement, it was popularized by author Stephen Covey in the late nineties in his book 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. Here is Covey’s definition. 

"A family mission statement is a combined, unified expression from all family members of what your family is all about — what it is you really want to do and be — and the principles you choose to govern your family life. "
Stephen Covey

However, the concept goes as far back as biblical times when we read:

"Where there is no vision, the people are unrestrained, but happy is he who keeps the law."
Proverbs 20:18 

Think about doing a jigsaw puzzle. How do you know where to place the pieces? You look at the picture of the finished product. You have a vision of what you are working toward. The chaos of all those little pieces would overwhelm you, but with the vision, you have faith and motivation to keep working. 

What kept Abraham going and living by faith? God gave him a vision. See Genesis 12:1-3. Interestingly enough, in the chapter right before, Genesis 11, is the Tower of Babel, where there was chaos because the people were not unified. 

Why Have a Family Mission Statement? 

No matter what your family make up is - even if it is just you and your child - a family mission statement will reinforce the security of your family unit. Even if you feel like your family is running pretty smoothly, writing a family mission statement now can uphold your family in times when life is not so smooth. 

God calls us, as leaders in our homes, to carry a clear vision for our families.

Are you navigating toddler tantrums or teenage attitudes? A strong, well-communicated vision—paired with age-appropriate expectations—creates unity and stability within your home. This can feel even more challenging when children are moving between two households with different values. Still, clarity matters. Set the standard, communicate it consistently, and remain committed to it—even when it’s difficult.

One of my favorite biblical leaders is Joshua. Though his statement was brief, it was powerful:

“But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
Joshua 24:15

Joshua made his expectations unmistakably clear. Regardless of what others chose or what pressures surrounded them, he declared that his household would serve the Lord—the same God who delivered his ancestors from Egypt and bondage. That boldness is the same confidence we, as moms, are called to embody. Our children should see that conviction lived out daily. This is where a family mission statement becomes so important.

When your mission statement is clearly defined and communicated well, it strengthens accountability within your home. In the busyness of everyday life, it’s easy to drift or let certain standards slide. But when your family’s mission remains central, everyone can work together to maintain the spiritual and emotional atmosphere of the household.

Inviting your children to help hold you accountable can feel risky. Have you ever experienced one of those “ouch” moments when your child points out something you need to do differently? It may sting in the moment, but it’s incredibly valuable. Those moments teach them courage, growth, and integrity. When we humble ourselves and model teachability, our children are far more likely to follow our example—and more open to receiving our guidance in other areas of their lives.

HOW TO BEGIN?

1. Call a family meeting or dinner to discuss your family mission statement.

(Hint: Keep it positive! Do not point out a child or a particular conflict.)

Hand out a sheet of paper with these questions or feel free to just openly discuss the questions below:

> How do you want to be treated as a family member? 
> How do you want to feel when we’re at home? 
> What are the unique talents, gifts, and abilities of each family member? 
> How should we support each family member’s interests? 
> How do you want your interests to be supported? 
> What qualities and characteristics do you feel it’s important to have? 
> What family traditions matter to you and why? 
> What principles and values matter to you the most? (e.g. trust, honesty, creativity, adventure, discipline, education, humor, fun, health) 
> How should we resolve conflict in our family? 
> How do we stay connected as a family? 
> How do we “Sabbath” (rest and relax)? 
> How do we do outreach as a family? 

Give your children a week to think about these questions. If you have young children, plan a separate meeting with each of them and record their answers. 

2. Evaluate the responses.

When you get everyone's responses, take time by yourself to go over them and find the similarities that overlap. Spend some time in prayer to hear from the Lord on what direction and focuses He has for your family.

3. Develop your rough draft.

Have another family meeting to review everyone's answers. Write a rough draft together incorporating everyone's answers, and reveal what the Lord has shown you regarding the vision for your family.

4. Implement the mission statement.

Make it fun and celebrate! Have a dinner or a special dessert prepared to go over the final mission statement. Post it somewhere everyone can see. Maybe even take a family photo to post with it.

Remember, family mission statements are flexible. Do a periodic review and update it as needed, and as your kids grow and mature. When children have “buy-in” because they helped create the guidelines, they are more likely to adhere to them. Finally, remember that you do not parent alone. You got this, momma!