Why 2 out of 3 Single Moms Don’t Attend Your Church

At nineteen years old, Chief Executive Officer & Founder of Unstuck Ministries, formerly known as The Life of a Single Mom®, Jennifer Maggio, was a homeless, severely abused, teen mom pregnant with her second child. She eventually found herself living in government housing utilizing food stamps and welfare simply to make ends meet. It wasn’t the life she had dreamed of or hoped for. Her mother had been killed many years earlier by a drunk driver, and her dad used alcohol to mask the pain of her mother's death. Jennifer suffered years of sexual assault, as a child, as well as malnourishment, abandonment, poverty, and physical & emotional abuse. When she found herself a single mother of two children, she almost crumbled under the weight of parenting woes, financial difficulties, poor choices, and trauma. And sadly... the lifelong church girl was certain she belonged anywhere but the local church.

There are approximately 23 million single moms in the United States. The number of single mother-led homes has more than doubled over the last 50 years, with almost 1 in every 2 babies born in the U.S. today outside of marriage. All indicators suggest these numbers will continue to rise. While single mother-led families face a number of statistical challenges, including a higher likelihood of living in poverty and having children who are more prone to high school dropout, suicide, and more, perhaps the most staggering statistic is that 67% of today’s single parents are not actively attending a local church. The sad reality is that many single mothers do not see the local church as a place of hope, solace, and reprieve. Yet, less than 1% of all Christian churches have any type of formalized single mother’s program for evangelism and discipleship.

Even as you read, you may be thinking of single moms that are thriving in your church. You may be thinking of “Angela” who had a rough divorce, but has now bounced back and is thriving in the church with her two precious kiddos, serving on a regular basis, and attending a regular Bible study. But for every Angela in your church, there are two other single mothers in your community convinced they don’t belong there. Many cite fear of judgment and rejection as reasons why they don’t have a home church. Further, we know that Satan is a master manipulator who will isolate single mothers and convince them they don’t belong in our churches. Whatever the reason that keeps them from coming, we must begin to explore ways to teach them how much they are loved and their value in Christ and what better place to do that than the local church?

While some churches have a singles’ ministry or divorce recovery program, many single mothers will not assimilate in those groups. We have found that divorce recovery programs only last 10-12 weeks and while they can prove valuable, we’d like to places for moms to attend after their graduation from such a program. Maybe your church does an annual single moms’ oil change or Mother’s Day Banquet. That is a beautiful start and a great way to evangelize the Gospel, but single moms’ ministry ideas need to go beyond one-time annual events.

In most churches, singles ministries tend to be a co-ed crowd. Some single mothers who are recently divorced or enduring trauma through death or a break-up may not be ready to mingle in a co-ed environment, yet. This is why single moms’ ministries are a great bonus to supplement divorce care and singles’ ministries.

To be clear, we’re huge proponents of divorce recovery programs, but what happens after the 10 weeks end? What about the moms who were never married? Banquets and one-time events are great ways to serve single mothers and reach new moms, but be certain that you have a formalized Bible study or single moms’ fellowship to plug moms after they graduate a 10-week parenting or divorce recovery program. This ensures long-term discipleship and fellowship. Singles ministries, single moms’ ministries, divorce programs, and single dads’ programs can all co-exist in a church. Let’s not over-complicate things. For more on how to start a single moms’ ministry, visit HERE.

Father, let us be a living vessel for James 1:27. Give us creative, fresh, new ideas on reaching the unreached and serving the broken-hearted. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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